Depending On The Light

West River

”til I Burned For You


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Lyrics

Seventeen miles

Seventeen miles from door to door
It’s not such a long way
Not such a long way
Seventeen miles of streets and stores
A small stretch of highway
A small stretch of highway
And seventeen miles can be seventeen miles
It can easily be much more
Seventeen miles is a long, long way
When you don’t know what forgiveness is for

Twenty-four hours from dusk to dusk
It’s not such a long day
Not such a long day
We set to the tasks that are set before us
You do them your way
And I’ll do them my way
And twenty-four hours can be much less
It can easily turn to much more
Twenty-four hours can turn into a lifetime
When you don’t know what forgiveness is for
And I am ready to come home once more

A few years of laughing and a few years of pain
Oh it’s not such a long shot
You gave it your best shot
Lovers always wish they could do it again
But you give it what you’ve got
And you gave it what you’ve got
And what you’ve got can seem like so much less
Now that you see so much more
But what you’ve got is the strange way we are blessed
When we learn what forgiveness is for
And you are ready to go home once more

Seventeen miles
Twenty-four hours
A few years of laughter
A few years of pain
Seventeen miles
Seventeen miles

The tricks you do

It was a job too biggie for the pretty little piggie
She couldn’t blow your big house down
Couldn’t blow it to the ground
Couldn’t lay your burden down
She wandered to the cliff and tossed her papers at the wind
But the wind brought them back around
Saying look at all the words you found
The fury of the final sound
And if I ever enter your mind
What are the tricks you do?
Cuz I would like to learn them too

She was a scientific vixen with her stirrin’ and a mixin’
But the potions never turned out right
One part moon one part night
Nothing stayed in the light
He was a poet when they started but his words got harder
And they rattled him like a cage
They weren’t things he’d ever say
But he said them anyway
And if I ever enter your mind
What are the tricks you do?
Cuz I would like to learn them too

Love is gone I heard a church bell chime
Across a silent countryside

Well it’s like Sodom and Gomorrah but if you want to come on over
I’m sure I got some food around
Flour by the pound, there’s something we can scrounge
But there’s nothing quite so tasty as a parent wearing pasties
Shake her silicone around
Nothing new on hallowed ground
Sweet dreams all around
And if I ever enter your mind
And if I ever enter your mind
If I ever enter your mind
What are the tricks you do?
Cuz I would like to learn them too

Depending on the light

There’s a million different reasons I should not stop by tonight
Like it’s cold and snowing outside
And I’ve acted indifferent one too many times
But oh my love what a beautiful night

There’s a million different reasons we should get some sleep
The girl in the mirror’s not as young as she used to be
And she’s still got a young girls pride
But oh my love what a beautiful night

There’s a million different reasons I should turn around
It’s a long empty street and a long way down
And the first thing I need will be the last to ever feel right
But oh my love what a beautiful night

There’s a million different reasons I can’t feel my feet
Flying faster in the snow’s stunning shimmering
Rushing or standing still, depending on the light
But oh my love what a beautiful night
What a beautiful night

Said and done

When all is said and done
There is still this grey day still the comfort of
What never was and in some way lives on as the best of us
The thing with love you can hate it but it does not go away
The thing with love you can chase it but you cannot make it stay
It does what it does, my sweetest friend
When all is said and all is done

When all is said and done
There are still these words like wine upon our lips
We bless each one like a woman breaks a bottle on a ship
The thing with words you can take them into any angry sea
The thing with words you can break things that you do not know you need
Until each one has been unsaid
My sweetest friend you’ve come undone

She hears the phone ring when no one has called
We say the worst things with no words at all

When all is said and done there is still this heart beating like a fist
Eternal drum sounding rhythms in the red beneath my wrist
The thing with blood, it can shame you ‘til you do not know your name
The thing with love it can take you to the thicker blood you claim
Until you’ve said what must be said
And done the thing that must be done
When all is said and all is done

Strangely alone

You are cleaning out a teapot from our senseless days
Before reason interjected her senseless ways
Before you held yourself back took stock took stake
When we had it made had it made had it made
And I have watched you scramble for shore
I will not stay silent any more, I am waiting for you to turn
I am waiting to be known, I am strangely alone

He is laughing to himself in the corner of a bar
He cannot believe there is a sum of choices so far
See they mattered so much but in all the wrong ways
Then they didn’t matter at all other days other days
She can hold her heart out like an olive in a drink
But she’s thirty-five years old, has had plenty of time to think
She is thinking of her mother in a nursing home, she is strangely alone

If you wanted to turn to me well you know you always could
But you think it takes more effort than this sort of thing should
And in the free-floating world of dictated desires
I can understand your need to set your sites a little higher
But some days I feel beautiful in an ugly sort of way
Like a baby or a highway or a highway or a highway
I am sitting on a shore of strangely shaped stones
I am strangely alone

West river

Take off this laugh it’s a reminder
Of all that has passed
It could be kinder if it came down to that
Take off this laugh

Take off this price
I have found it too much to bear
I can’t find a thing to wear
Take off this price

And if you see a piece of my soul
Down by the shed where the wind never blows
Out by the bend where the West River flows
Tell them I’ve left all that I know

Take off this dance
I have lived in its charms for too long
I have needed its arms to be strong
Take off this dance

Take off this game
I have been hurt by the way that I’ve played
I lose every time that I win
Take off this game

And if you see a piece of my soul
Down by the shed where the wind never blows
Out by the bend where the West River flows
Tell them I’ve left all that I know
(repeat)

Not in this lifetime

You and me, we’re never gonna be friends
No not in this lifetime
Because the body remembers the things it lost
Like the bottle remembers the wine
And you and me are never going to be lovers
No not in this lifetime
Because the hands remember the dreams they held
Like the wall is remembered by vines

There was a man who told me be as kind as you can
And the let the feathers fall where they may
And I was kinder than anyone should have been
And that man went away

You and me are never gonna be mother and daughter
No not in this lifetime
And the sorrows wait around every corner
Like the swallows wait on the line
And you and me are never gonna be forgiven
No not in this lifetime
Cuz the boy remembers and the girl remembers
But neither remembers in time

There was a man who told me be as kind as you can
And the let the feathers fall where they will
And I was crueler than anyone should have been
And that man is with me still

‘Til I burned for you

I’ve seen a dark weight
In the corner of my eye
A wing with a wave
Let go of the sky
And I’ve see the kindness
Fall from a face
A clown in his blindness
Stumble from a stage
I’ve thrown a stone on the ice
And watched it fall through
But I never knew falling
‘Til I fell for you

And I’ve seen a vase
Shatter on the ground
They put things back together
With the things that are found
I’ve seen the bones
Of my brother give way
I’ve seen a clean dollar
Break a lesser man
I’ve seen the strangest light
Break o’er the loneliest moon
But I never knew broken
‘Til I broke for you

I’ve seen anger
Blaze into a tree
I’ve seen a gentle man
Burn with sudden clarity
And I’ve seen the babe
And I’ve seen the iron
And Ive seen the number
And I’ve seen the scar
I’ve seen the warmest light
At the end of a long cold room
But I never knew burning
‘Til I burned for you

Missing her for Christmas

Maybe there’ll be mistletoe
Hung a certain place
Moonlight hits the snow just so
Reminds you of her face
Maybe you’ll raise your cup, but you won’t feel the cheer
If you’re missing her for Christmas this year

Maybe someone’s laugh
Will make you gasp and turn her way
Filled with flurried hope like snow that quickly melts away
Or waking from a dream in which
The dream still seemed so clear
If you’re missing her for Christmas this year
If you’re missing her for Christmas this year

And in your dreams do you see someone who’s missing you?
A silent night with starry lights that shine down on you too?
Wishing on each one of them miracles came true
And waking to the grace of what is here
The familiar ache of missing you each year

Maybe there’ll be mistletoe
Hung a certain way
A holiday stocking you know you’ll have to put away
Maybe the door knocking will set your heart to race
Then laugh at your own foolish tears
If you’re missing her for Christmas this year
If you’re missing her for Christmas this year

The storm

In the hottest part of summer in the city’s furthest corner
In the worst storm of the year
I was hiding in my basement wondering what the hell it all meant
When you shattered through the shutters of my fear
I said don’t you even bother any more
I have lost what there is to lose before

So I battened down the hatches and I guarded my possessions
And I told you bring it on
I’ve been left by every lover been banished by my mother
I learned how to get along
So don’t you come here with your hand inside my days
I have learned the hard ways of your ways
You said how about some love? How about some faith?
How about I sit your pretty butt down and put you in your place?

I was buying what they’re selling learning secrets just for telling
I was higher than a kite
I was swinging I was singing who knows what I was slinging
When I had you in my sites that night
I said don’t you even bother with my name
Not gonna need it for this game we’re playing

Then I battened down my hatches and I guarded all my passions
And I told you bring it on
You said I know what you’re doing and you fixed me with your looking
And you told me what you saw
You said how about we put those games away?
Fools may change the rules, but no one changed your name
And how about some love? How about some faith?
How about I sit your pretty butt down and put you in your place?

In the hottest part of summer in the city’s furthest corner
In the worst storm of the year
I was hiding in my basement wondering what the hell it all meant
When you shattered through the shutters of my fear
I said don’t you try to love me any more
Don’t you try to love me any more
(repeat)

And you said that’s not how this goes
I don’t go away
I appear here in the storm winds of your worst fears
Blowing everything in place

Calling

Come down the nearest twisted tree
And ride on the kindest wind
Untangle these broken branches in me
I am not strong enough to let them go

Walk on the waters of my blood
And take this passion from my bones
And let him know I walk away in love
I am not strong enough to let him know

Hear me, for your Grace I’m calling
Let me feel your footsteps in my soul
My God, this child of yours is falling
Come and hold me like you’ll never let me go

Bring my feet into the earth
And pull my thoughts up to the moon
And let them circle once then scatter
I am not strong enough to let them go

Bring me your angels in your music
And the Love that can conquer any foe
I have grown weary of begging for my freedom
I cannot claim my freedom on my own

Hear me, for your Grace I’m calling
Let me feel your footsteps in my soul
My God, this child of yours is falling
Come and hold me like you’ll never let me go

The way home

Coffee shops full of baby toys and baby boys
And long walks with just held hands
And it wasn’t so long ago when
One of those hands was yours
You can almost still feel his warmth

Now there’s good advice
Flying in from every side
And none of it sounds like truth to you
And it wasn’t so long ago
When easier was still easier
And almost true would still almost do

But something had to change
Something has already changed
Broken pieces lie like a blessing not a warning and
You were the hand you needed to hold
You were the words you needed to be told
You were the story yet to unfold
You were the way

Now it’s your mother’s voice
With a new decision but the same choice
You crack apart along old fault lines
And it wasn’t so long ago
You would’ve made the choice you know
Say don’t you worry, the fault is mine

But something had to change
Something has already changed
Your silence rings out like a telling not informing and
You were the hand you needed to hold
You were the words you needed to be told
You were the story yet to unfold
You were the way finally home

You were the way lost
Your were the way found
You were the way through
Cuz there was no way around
You were the way back
When you were way gone
You were the way home
You were the way home
You were the way home

Evening light and no one shares the coming night
The shades are drawn and the blankets laid
And it wasn’t so long ago
You would’ve seen just what wasn’t there
But night is more than a darkened day

Something had to change
Something has already changed
And evening falls like a comfort not a shrouding and
You were the hand you needed to hold
You were the words you needed to be told
You were the story yet to unfold
You were the way finally home
Finally home
Finally home